Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Out of the Comfort Zone

I had one thing that I needed to do before I stop "doing the right things" in regards to finding a woman to share my life with. Last week I went to a local watering hole with my buddy Dave P. and I was completely smitten by our server, and I had the guts to tell her so. I screwed up the courage to ask her out, but she demurred somewhat and told me to put my number down and that she would decide to call or not.

I've been thinking about her quite a bit. She hasn't called, but I wanted her to know that I was in earnest. Dave told me that I needed to go back by myself, so I steeled my resolve tonight to do just that, but I decided to write her a letter as well. I didn't know if I'd see her or not, and even if I did, I figured a handwritten letter on on some really nice cotton stationery is something your average woman doesn't receive very often. Besides, in that sort of context, I'd rather rely on my written word than extemporaneous stammerings.

I almost didn't go in, because I felt silly, but I did anyway since I told myself that the best things in life have only happened to me when I've taken risks. Once I got in, I sidled up to that bar and had a couple of beers and contemplated how to close the deal and pass on the letter. I saw her once, and I think she saw me, and of course I manufactured a million reasons in my mind why she was freaking out that I was there. The whole time I was trying to figure out how to pass on the letter to her if I saw her again. All in all I was pretty uncomfortable thinking about why I had come, half ready to turn on my heels and walk out the door and burn the letter when I got home.

After awhile I started to get chatty with one of the other waitresses who kept coming up to the bar to fill her orders. I made her chuckle a few times and I began to formulate a plan in my mind. I figured that she could be my accomplice, so I worked on her a little more, chatting with her every time she came up. After I paid my bill, I waited for the right moment and asked her if she'd do a favor for me. I must have appeared conspiratorial because she leaned in really close and said yes. I told her she should only say yes after she heard what I was going to request. I then proceeded to tell her that I was in last week and had a server by the name of (get this...) Meghan, and that I was immediately smitten by her. I told her that I was sort of a hopeless romantic and that I had written her a letter, and wondered if she would mind passing it on to Meghan when she saw her. I told her that now I was embarrassed, and that at least they'd all have something to talk about tonight, but she agreed to pass the note on. I have to think it added a little excitement to an otherwise ordinary evening. I don't think it's every night that someone drops off a note like that, and if I know anything about women, they like the thought of something like that being done, even if nothing comes of it. I would imagine every woman would enjoy a random guy writing them a note like that, even if there was never any interest in the one who penned the letter. And that's what I said in the letter, that even if she wasn't interested in me, that I hoped receiving a letter like this would brighten her day. I told her she was beautiful and adorable, and that she should never forget it. I figure that's a nice letter to receive, even if she never calls.

I'm not holding my breath, but I'm glad I passed it on rather than turning on my heels and going home with my tail between my legs. It's out of my hands now, but all that matters is that I did it.


Scott Lyons said...

Heroic stuff there, my man.

Dan said...

Thanks for the pat on the back. So far no word, but that's OK. I wrote a letter to a woman once who I was smitten with in a similar way. I heard back from here about three or four years later, and we even went out, so maybe I'm just planting the seed...